John Francis - Chapter 126

Thursday, June 26, 2008 at 4:52 AM
The party wandered out to all the limos and other waiting cars as they drove back to the hotel where the band was staying. It seemed as if half the people who had come to the concert had decided to come to the hotel afterwards. There were police everywhere and extra security had been arranged for tonight as the London police were aware of this situation as it had happened before on many of their concert tours.

Richie, then Jon, then Amanda got out of the limo. She smiled at them as both took an arm and they moved toward the lobby. They waved to the fans and flashbulbs were profuse as they entered the building. There was no stopping tonight. David, Hugh, and Tico were in the limo behind them and they chatted a bit with the waiting fans, but soon entered. Others were already in the lounge area that had been set aside for the party and the room was soon overflowing into others adjacent to it. They moved over to the bar area and Amanda noticed that Jon had a Jack on the rocks. A small frown crossed her face at that as she was coming to realize he favored that drink when upset or angry.

Right now she was just thirsty, so she got a water, while Richie ordered a beer. They talked for a few moments. Amanda had her back to the door, but noticed a slight stiffening in the bodies of both men in front of her before they resumed talking. Casually looking around, Amanda saw a brunette who had been at the stadium party. She was a very beautiful woman, probably in her mid-to-late thirties, who was dressed in sexy but classy clothing. She moved gracefully throughout the room, but kept a bit to the sidelines. Amanda made her glance at the woman appear to be just a general sweep of the crowd and turned back to the men.

Jon reached out to put his hand on her arm and pulled her in close to him. He wanted her near him and wanted to be alone with her, but Carrie’s arrival had caused him a bit of a problem. He put his mouth next to Amanda’s ear.

“I need to use the restroom, baby. Be back in a few.”

She kissed him and smiled her acknowledgement. Richie stayed with her as he had an idea of what Jon was up to when Carrie followed him out within a few moments. They talked for a short time and then Amanda announced she was heading to the restroom also and to please tell Jon she would be back in a few. Richie couldn’t come up with a reason fast enough to delay her and she walked out of the room.

A long hallway led to a set of more private single person bathrooms and there were several alcoves along the way. As she approached one that was close to the bathrooms, she heard voices, a woman’s voice and then Jon’s voice. She stopped before she reached the room, unable not to listen.

“Honey, I’ve missed you.” The woman’s voice was soft and husky.

“Carrie, I…” Jon started, but Carrie moved her mouth over his, silencing his words with a kiss.

Amanda walked closer at that moment and saw his arms go around the woman as he returned the kiss. Okay, breathe…wait. She moved back out of sight and listened. Very quickly she heard Jon’s voice again.

“Carrie…don’t. I’m sorry, but we need to talk.” Jon’s voice was quiet as he didn’t want to hurt her, but he wasn’t going to risk losing Amanda.

“Jon, you can always talk to me. Take me to bed and make love to me, then tell me your secrets. It’s been too long, love.” Carrie stroked the side of Jon’s face as she spoke.

She had been with him long enough to know that often he would want her immediately and then he would spend time talking about things that might be bothering him.

“I can’t do that, Carrie. I…can’t see you anymore…we have to end this.” His voice had hoarsened as he broke the news to her.

“What do you mean, love? We’ve been together for years. What has changed? No one knows about us. And now, what would it matter if someone did? You are divorced. We can finally be together without looking over our shoulders. You don’t have to hide me anymore, Jon.”

Taking a deep breath and letting it out in a sigh, Jon tried to explain. “Oh Carrie, you know I’ve always cared about you, but you knew I would never leave my wife…”

She interrupted him then. “Of course, but now there is no wife to leave, no reason for us not to be together.”

Now it was Jon’s turn to stroke her cheek. “Carrie…I’ve…well, I’ve met someone.” His statement stained the air with its implications.

“You’ve met someone?” Carrie’s voice was flat as she struggled to absorb what she was being told.

“Yes…about six weeks ago.”

Carrie’s voice sounded shocked. “Six weeks? You’re leaving me after five years for someone you’ve been with for only six weeks?”

Outside the room Amanda stiffened in surprise as she heard this. He'd lived a double life for five years?

Her voice softening, Carrie shook her head from side to side.

“Jon, never once did someone suspect we were lovers, never did your wife find out. This girl you are seeing, she does not have to know. I had hoped you and I would…well, finally be together, but if that is not to be, why not let things continue as they were? She will never find out. Dorothea never did.”

“I can’t do that, Carrie. I’ve given her my word…” Jon attempted to explain.

“Pfft!” Carrie made a dismissive sound. “And all the words you said to me? How many times have you come to me over the years? How many places did you have me fly to just to be with you? No, you did not tell me you loved me, but what man does what you have done for another woman for all this time if there is not some love involved?”

Not wanting to lie to her, Jon answered as best he could. “I do care for you and we have been together a long time. Carrie…I thought what I felt for you might be love and that someday we might possibly be together, but what’s happened to me over the last few months has shown me that I was wrong about so many things. I was wrong to have started this with you. No matter how bad my marriage was and what my reasons were, I was selfish. I’ll always care about you, but I don’t love you and you deserve someone who does love you.”

Carrie took in a breath in anticipating of speaking, but stopped when Jon held up a hand, then placed both hands on her arms.

“I don’t know how to say this without hurting you even more, but within just a few days with Amanda I knew. I knew I loved her. All those years Carrie I could never say that to you, no matter how much I cared. What I did was hurt other people and now I’m hurting you. I’m really sorry, but you deserve more than I can ever give you.”

“I don’t understand this. Everything you asked of me I gave you. I kept quiet and never told a soul about you. During all this time I was never able to tell anyone that I loved you. I never even said it to you because I felt you would run if I told you my true feelings. Now you tell me that all of this was wasted time? How old is this girl who has taken you from me? Some child?” Carrie’s voice was low, but the anger in it was loud.

“She’s not a girl, Carrie, she’s 44.” Jon’s voice also was quiet, but filled with anguish at the hurt he knew he was causing someone he had cared about.

“She’s 44! Jon, don’t you want more children? Don’t you want a new life?” She was surprised, expecting a woman younger than her to have caught his attention.

“No, I don’t want more children and yes, I do want a new life. That’s why I had to talk to you, why I had to tell you in person that I can’t keep doing the things that caused the end of my old life. Dot might not have known about you, Carrie, but one of the things that will cause me to lose Amanda is to do what I did to Dot.”

With her eyes shimmering with tears, although they were more from surprise and dismay than of true loss, Carrie shook her head. She disengaged herself from his arms and put her hands on her hips, looking at him closely.

“You really do love her.” Her voice was not a question.

Gently shaking his head, he answered her. “Yes, I love her.”

“She’s a lucky woman, Jon, I hope she knows that.”

Taking a deep breath, Amanda stepped into the room, surprising them both. She looked at Jon as she spoke.

“She knows.”

7 comments

  1. Anonymous Says:

    That was great.

  2. Anonymous Says:

    that was worth waiting for!

  3. Cathy Says:

    Wow two great chapters! I love how Jon tried to be as kind as possible and made her realise he loved Amanda. Can't want to read more!

  4. Sandy Says:

    How amazing is Amanda...gotta give her credit for waiting to see what would happen after Jon and Carrie kissed. I'm not sure I would have been able to wait. Another great chapter. Thank you.

  5. Opester Says:

    Great chapter, Babe! I really like how Jon handled it with Carrie and it shows how he's grown in leaps and bounds with taking responsibility for his actions. Amanda has been a great influence on him!

  6. joviswillow Says:

    Wow! That was really intense. I loved it!

  7. jovikitn65 Says:

    Jon handled Carrie perfectly. Since Amanda has been listening to the conversation she has come to realize two things; 1 jon had a ongoing affair with Carrie for 5 years; 2 how deeply he loves her. Great job with the descriptions and dialogue.

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